So I've had a pretty sucky couple of weeks. First, my horse tried to kill herself in that stupid trailer. Then last weekend I found out that I failed the damn bar exam, which totally sucked and completely ruined my weekend. I admit, I fell into a funk.
I've been temping, and for the last two weeks I've been at a medical office that I've worked at a few times before. When I went to work Monday, I found out that one of the other employees there was sitting at the hospital - a family member had been shot over the weekend and was in critical condition. That snapped me out of my self-pity a bit.
This week I've been alternating between feeling sorry for myself and trying very hard to appreciate the good stuff that happens every day. I'm trying really hard to just focus on the good stuff. I don't have enough money to just up and buy a slant, but I have enough to go to Vegas in a couple of weeks to meet up with my BFFs. I didn't pass the bar, but at least I have a job. And my horse is a badass who only gets more awesome every day. Maybe we'll even get to go to a ride in CA in June!
I know I should Buckle Down and Train My Horse and Make Those Miles Count, but I haven't been feeling it. Last weekend, I rode once for maybe 12 miles, then headed out for another ride but turned back because the weather went from "pretty nice" to "sideways sleet" in 10 minutes. Yesterday I took Dixie for a "normal people short ride" after work. We went out for 20 minutes, just to stretch her legs. Then today I took her and Cersei on an "endurance short" ride. We did 5.5 miles, out of the neighborhood, along the shore of the (shallow, seasonal) lake, then back along the road to the subdivision again.
Dixie is just an amazing horse. I've been working with her since we moved to LV, and now we're at the point where I can mount up in "her" driveway and ride the 2.5 blocks to open land. Up until last week, I'd been walking her in hand, so she could get used to the monsters along the way. Today we made it past a house where three people were loading (very calmly, I might add) a horse in a 2h straight, a bunch of dogs, riders headed in the other direction, some cars coming home, some cars zooming past, and even two motorcycles. Then on our ride - she wasn't exactly pushbutton about going on this strange new trail along the lake, but she did it without a big fuss. And on the way back, she offered to canter on gravel. And she trotted just fine over gravel! I think I have a Gravel Crunching Horse, finally. How cool is that?
Tomorrow: many, many miles. Just me and Dixie, and maybe I'll even bring my little ipod shuffle. The weather should be totally beautiful. May all of yall get some lovely rides in too!
I'm so sorry for the suckiness.
ReplyDeleteIt will get better, I promise...especially if you take that good horse of yours out for a nice, long ride with your only intention being to have fun.
Give Dixie an extra carrot from her friends in the Swamp!
It's hard to focus on the positive when bad stuff happens - even if it isn't life-threatening bad stuff. Very sorry about the bar exam - can you find out what areas of the test gave you trouble? - better luck next time - many people pass on their second try.
ReplyDeleteNice that you've got some equi-therapy going.
So Sorry to hear about the bar. And I'm gals everything is working out so well with Dixie. Sometimes I think life is nothing but a series of juxapositions.
ReplyDeleteRegarding your Bar exam, my uncle (current DA for Santa Cruz, graduated top 5 in his class) failed the Bar 3 times but is now doing fine! Dont give up hope!!!
ReplyDeleteJust let me know if you want to go to Cooley Ranch and you are welcome to throw your horse in our trailer :)
What a rollercoaster for you! I'm so glad Dixie is fine, and I'm sorry about the bar exam and your coworker's relative. We are lucky to have our horses, who help us cope with the bad times. Except, of course, when they're busy plotting suicide. Then they make us crazy. Hang in there!
ReplyDeleteGosh...I hope you DID have some great riding therapy today...get out and over that suckie last few weeks!
ReplyDeleteSo sorry about the bar. You'll do it again right?! Just costs money- right!
Well,my crap a-- renters on property decided to turn the back yard near the turnout paddocks and drive ways around the barn.... into a motocross track today, after my PBO left the scene.
I am forbidden to "Talk to" the poor little teenagers ... must go to the door and knock respectfully so for the Crap A-- father(bully).
I called my PBO...she better fix this or I will be in a funk too Fund. My mare will be all the way desensitized to motors and racing bikes,very soon though!
Heck with them...if they ride by the barn again(as I am walking out with a horse) I won't talk...but YELL!
Your mare is awesome...truly!
I am resorting- peaceably so- to some sports medicine type of horse shoes next week. My mare unfortunately...too blame soggy in Oregon, is NOT a gravel crunching horse yours is. Plus our gravel ...is more boulder like.
Be well horse friend...good things are a waiting for the both of us!
KK
Kate, I can see my score on each essay, but that doesn't really help. Other than the Secured Transactions essay question (WTF!!! Who puts ST on the bar? Much less as one whole question!?!?), all the questions had lots of components.
ReplyDeleteMy plan is to diligently search for a Career Job until August, then reapply for the Feb '11 bar. If I can just find some kind of potentially satisfying career, I don't care if I'm never admitted in Nevada. I passed the MS bar on the first try, so I know I can do it... I just want a decent job now.
Aarene and all of yall - you're so right. It will get better, and horses make it better fast. Thank you :)
Kaci - Breathe deep. Remember, it's "desensitizing." Not "jerks on dirt bikes." "Desensitizing." You should print up flyers and hold a "desensitization clinic!" And really, I think the climate out here is responsible for 60% of Dixie's amazing soundness. You are fighting an uphill battle in the Swamplands, and it's no shame to shoe a horse up there. I have heard really good things about Natural Balance, but I think as long as you have a good farrier then Wa will be ok!